You're not really reading this, are you?

I don't know if it's very vain to think that anything I write on here will be "seen", but I struggle with the thought that whatever I write down here can be read by anyone.

What's worse - someone you know reading what you write or someone you don't know reading what you write?

Whenever I write a tweet and I guess now a blog post too, I get a little wave of panic wash over me that someone might actually read it. Ridiculous. Why bother writing something if it's not to be read?

It would be so much easier to write a generic blog, something about fashion (if I knew something about that) or rant about parenting children (something I do know about) but I think there are plenty of those about already.

Besides, I happen to like reading something true and real best. And if I'm going to do this, I might as well do it for real, my thoughts and perspective on whatever it is I actually care about (one of these days I'll find what that is, stick with me).

But that's exactly what scares me, YOU, reading whatever crazy stuff makes it out of my head and onto here. And not knowing who YOU are! Or maybe I do know you and you know me and next time you see me you'll think, she's a bit of a neurotic idiot and then I'll not know you're thinking that and blah blah blah.

"You get me??"

If I make it back for another post, I might actually write about something. You never know.

Comments

Put a lid on it.

As I'm on holiday at the moment and lying by the pool (stick around, I'm going somewhere with this) it's only natural to have a look around at all the people surrounding me. Men, women. All different nationalities, ages and body shapes. I start playing the ranking game. Not very consciously but nevertheless I do it. A woman might be taller and leaner but have a slightly bigger belly. Bigger boobs but chubbier legs. Pretty arms but pasty skin. I think it's a way of confirming my own body shape is not perfect but neither is anyone else's. Would I want to swap one of my flaws for another? I wonder if we were put in a room by ourselves with no one to compare ourselves to or measure against would we be happier to accept who we are? Does the culture to share and compare through magazines, social networking etc. feed into our insecurities or is it a way for us to "like" ourselves by highlighting the areas we like and blurring out those which we don't. I...

Change the tune.

It's been a busy old month. Lots of change, with highs and very lows. But we are looking ahead now. Good things are on the horizon. Plenty of nice things to look forward to. So with that, let's put on some cheerful music, pick some new songs to listen to and get inspired to make it a great summer. Music can change my mood pretty quickly. If I put on a soppy, folky track I can write the most melancholic post ever. Put on a bright, dance tune and I'll skip the writing for a bit of a dance and the energy boost it gives me might result in a clean house (or room at least) or a speedy run. Finding a new favourite song can put me in a great mood and inspire new adventures. Projects will get started and if it's a really good song, the project might actually get finished too. There isn't much more entertaining to my children than me dancing around like a loon in the kitchen while we cook dinner. In contrast a sad song can evoke the strongest emotions. I rememb...

Mirror, mirror, on the wall...

We're having a sunny day here. I realise that the rest of the country is flooding, but let's focus on the rapidly approaching spring. Days are lighter longer, the sun is shining and birds are tweeting. Soon it will be summer and with that, time to bare all. Bikini anyone? I have always been pretty confident when it comes to just wearing what I like. You know those people who see themselves as lots bigger than they really are? Not me, I'm probably more on the delusional side where I tend to think it's not that bad. Surely not. Can't be. It's all good. But then a picture will show up that makes me question my whole theory. It's like a slap in the face seeing yourself in black and white (or colour), on paper or on screen. Especially when the person you are looking at looks nothing like the person you thought you allowed to walk out of the house after a look in the mirror that day. Usually the person in the photo looks a lot less sleek, pretty and slim th...

MEscovery

Search This Blog